Sentra
09-07-2005, 14:02
Here's a variety of hilarious error messages a friend sent me:
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WARNING: The letter you are writing to Mr. Bush is too complex. Please use simpler terms.
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A fatal exception 0E has occurred at 0028:54643bh5Xx. You really screwed up this time; please contact the nearest 12-year old to fix the problem.
And take a computer course, for crying out loud.
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Warning: You have critical errors in your brain. Would you like have an emergency biopsy? Click "Next" to proceed or "Cancel" to be ignored until you click "Next".
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Error: Sadly, one of the programs your running has failed to function properly and you’re going to have to restart. It’s my fault and I feel really bad about it. To say sorry for the trouble I have made the following changes:
I’ve fixed the broken file so this shouldn't happen again,
I've alerted all the people you are talking to that you'll be right back,
And I have also saved that project you where working on so all your work won't be lost, (nice job by the way)
Once again, I’m very sorry.
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ERROR: Monitor display unavailable.
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You Know Your Computer Hates You When It Gives You These Warnings:
1) If you put that horrible CD back into the CD drive one more time, you'll never get it back. This time I mean it. Click OK to get your CD back for the LAST TIME.
2) Stop smashing the keyboard. I know you hate me, but did it ever occur to you that I hate you too, and that's why I'm annoying you?
3) Error 42: The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
4) Hey idiot! Next time just don't download those files and I won't get the nasty viruses that kill me.
5) So you want to try to beat me at kickboxing? Well I know kickboxing and many other martial arts. Besides you're just a scrawny computer nerd, what harm can you do to me?
(For #3, 42 is a reference to Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. For #5, it's a response to a sticker that stated "My computer beat me at chess. I beat it at kickboxing.")
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Error: error
Unfortunately this error message is corrupt. Please repeat this error to correct.
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Shoe error
Reboot.
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I am currently experiencing a Butter Under-Run. Yes, that was Butter not 'Buffer'.
You curse me, deride me, call me stupid. Enough.
Butter me up, Geek Boy, or every bit of porn on my HD will be shot off to your boss, mother and girlfriend with your name on it. Have a nice day.
CPU
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ERROR: Microsoft does not always work properly. This is one of those times. There is something wrong with your computer. To avoid becoming angry and frustrated, please choose an option below:
1. Call Bill Gates and scream your lungs out
2. Call a computer technician and ask for help
3. Smash your computer to bits and pieces; purchase a new one
4. Crank up some angry music and scream profanities at your computer
5. Put on some calming music and remember the good times you and you computer had in the past; then move on.
6. Other:_______________________________________
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WARNING: The letter you are writing to Mr. Bush is too complex. Please use simpler terms.
---
A fatal exception 0E has occurred at 0028:54643bh5Xx. You really screwed up this time; please contact the nearest 12-year old to fix the problem.
And take a computer course, for crying out loud.
---
Warning: You have critical errors in your brain. Would you like have an emergency biopsy? Click "Next" to proceed or "Cancel" to be ignored until you click "Next".
---
Error: Sadly, one of the programs your running has failed to function properly and you’re going to have to restart. It’s my fault and I feel really bad about it. To say sorry for the trouble I have made the following changes:
I’ve fixed the broken file so this shouldn't happen again,
I've alerted all the people you are talking to that you'll be right back,
And I have also saved that project you where working on so all your work won't be lost, (nice job by the way)
Once again, I’m very sorry.
---
ERROR: Monitor display unavailable.
---
You Know Your Computer Hates You When It Gives You These Warnings:
1) If you put that horrible CD back into the CD drive one more time, you'll never get it back. This time I mean it. Click OK to get your CD back for the LAST TIME.
2) Stop smashing the keyboard. I know you hate me, but did it ever occur to you that I hate you too, and that's why I'm annoying you?
3) Error 42: The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
4) Hey idiot! Next time just don't download those files and I won't get the nasty viruses that kill me.
5) So you want to try to beat me at kickboxing? Well I know kickboxing and many other martial arts. Besides you're just a scrawny computer nerd, what harm can you do to me?
(For #3, 42 is a reference to Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. For #5, it's a response to a sticker that stated "My computer beat me at chess. I beat it at kickboxing.")
---
Error: error
Unfortunately this error message is corrupt. Please repeat this error to correct.
--
Shoe error
Reboot.
--
I am currently experiencing a Butter Under-Run. Yes, that was Butter not 'Buffer'.
You curse me, deride me, call me stupid. Enough.
Butter me up, Geek Boy, or every bit of porn on my HD will be shot off to your boss, mother and girlfriend with your name on it. Have a nice day.
CPU
--
ERROR: Microsoft does not always work properly. This is one of those times. There is something wrong with your computer. To avoid becoming angry and frustrated, please choose an option below:
1. Call Bill Gates and scream your lungs out
2. Call a computer technician and ask for help
3. Smash your computer to bits and pieces; purchase a new one
4. Crank up some angry music and scream profanities at your computer
5. Put on some calming music and remember the good times you and you computer had in the past; then move on.
6. Other:_______________________________________